Pumpkintastic!

Perhaps it's my Protestant unpbringing, but I've never liked Hallowe'en. I have no interest in evil spirits, mysticism and magic, or feeding large amounts of sugar to the neighbourhood children begging at the door. When I lived in the UK I would hand out fruit. That taught them!

But I've obviously been living in North America for too long...

This year I have thrown aside all my caution and decided that with all its rampant commercialism and ridiculous traditions, I actually like Hallowe'en after all. I love the symbols of autumn and harvest that abound in these months, and figured that it's a short step from an artistic display of pumpkin, squash and gourds to a marvellously tacky carved Jack-O'-Lantern on the doorstep. Plus you get to dress up, and I'm always up for that! So I'm throwing myself into it with gay abandon.

Yesterday I had an unexpected day off work, so had my own personal pumpkin-fest. It's impossible to drive anywhere with me at this time of year without me being seduced by one of the many roadside stalls selling the fruits of the season. Whilst on my way back from town yesterday morning I came across the most amazing stall where I managed to pick up a great selection of pumpkins and squash. Take a look at these babies, lined up ready for the chop! The dollar-store carving-kit sits ready in the foreground. Strangely I also found a tin of pumpkin puree in the kitchen cupboard... yet another of those exciting things that I must have picked up in the supermarket, later realising that I hate pumpkin pie. D'oh!

Being a novice pumpkin-carver, I can't claim to have too many creative ideas for carving, but I can copy pretty well. Last year I went down the 'tasteful' route for my first ever carved pumpkin, and copied a design from the National Trust magazine. I was really pleased with it and displayed it on the doorstep for weeks. Until it rotted actually... Here it is - making a tentative stab at being a bit scary, but cute and smiley too:

This year however, none of that namby-pamby cute-and-smiley crap for me! I stumbled upon a fantastic website here and was immediately inspired. I don't suppose Hallowe'en was ever meant to be 'nice'... When you're up to your elbows in pumpkin-goo (these things are full of slime!) it somehow seems appropriate to make something like the 'Puking Pumpkin':

This was a simple one - little carving talent required - so then I decided to move onto something rather more ambitious... the 'Cannibal Pumpkin':

Boy, this one was trickier, especially those eyes (which I'm still not happy with... but what kind of sap gets too perfectionist about carving vegetables?!). It was a masterpiece of engineering to get that baby pumpkin to stay in its mouth. The scene was completed with the addition of a face to the teeny pumpkin, and a second scared-looking veg:

They're on the doorstep now and - nearly 2 weeks early - I'm ready for Hallowe'en! All thoughts of fruit forgotten, I have a bag of Walmart's best pumpkin-shaped-marshmallows to hand out to the scrounging kids. Their parents can deal with the ensuing sugar-high. My witches hat and wig is ready so, glass of 'blood' (red wine) in hand, I'll toast the Eve of All Hallows with a smile (and a witchy cackle!).